Clarissa Pinkola Estes once said “We are all filled with longing for the wild . There are few cultural sanctioned antidotes for this yearning . We were taught to feel shame for such desire . We grew our hair long and used it to hide our feelings. But the shadow of wild woman still lurks behind us during our days and nights. No matter where we are, the shadow that trots behind us is definitely four-footed”.
I remember when my mother decided to let go of my father . I was around 12 , 13 years old at that time . A day before the big fight , my mother woke me up around 12 midnight and we sat by the stairs outside our house . The moon as full as if God himself was looking down on us . She didn’t say anything we just sat there for hours looking at the moon , without her saying anything I could see her pain in her eyes the betrayal , the anger she was feeling , the hurt , no one could ever understand what she was going through except for herself . She pulled me in and looked at me and said to me Sicelo the most important thing in your life is God and your dreams. So many things my mother has taught me , but the one thing she always made sure I understood is to put myself first before anyone.She showed me how to access the power of the wild woman.
As a young girl with all the things I was going through made me resent the idea of being a woman, being a mother , a wife , a friend and everything in between . Five years later and didn’t life teach me a lesson . The more I grew older, the more I started to learn to mindfully let go of the overly positive woman . Finding that being good , being sweet, being nice will not cause life to sing. I am starting to acknowledge these unequivocally. By making the best relationships one can with the worst parts of oneself. Letting the pressure build between who one is taught to be and who one really is. Ultimately working towards letting the old self die and the new intuitive self be born.
As you grow to become a woman it doesn’t really matter whether a woman’s concerns and aspirations are personal or global. Before all else,every action begins with strengthening the spirit . I learnt the way to maintain ones connection to the wild is to ask yourself what is it you want, what are you hungry for, what do you long for, what do you wish for now, what do you crave for and what do you desire are the most important questions to ask yourself. The process is beautiful for everyone . Every scare , every mountain , every mile shows you your power, the power of a wild woman. The things we should never forget.As women we are strong when we stand with another soul. When we are with others, we cannot be broken . Always understand that the process of remaining conscious, and particularly of not giving in to distracting appetites while trying to elicit psychic connection, is a long process, and one that is difficult to hold to. Connect to the power of the wild woman ,connect to the woman who runs with wolves.